--- title: "Instagram DM Settings Every Coach Should Change" slug: instagram-dm-settings author: "Leonardo Maldonado" category: "Channels" articleType: how-to-guide tags: ["Instagram DM settings","message requests","notifications"] publishedAt: 2026-11-04T16:00:00.000Z updatedAt: 2026-11-04T16:00:00.000Z canonical: https://setluca.com/blog/instagram-dm-settings ---# Instagram DM Settings Every Coach Should Change > The Instagram DM settings that matter most for coaches are the ones that decide whether a lead's message reaches you. They are message controls (who can message you and where their requests land), Hidden Words, read receipts, pinned chats, Sleep mode and your notifications. Check each one once, then check your message requests every day. Ten minutes of setup stops leads from waiting days in a folder you never open. ## Key takeaways - Message controls decide whether a new lead's message lands in your Chats, your requests folder, or nowhere. Never set "nowhere" for people who don't follow you. - Hidden Words can move a real lead's request into a hidden folder if it contains a filtered word. Check that folder too. - Turning off read receipts lets you read a lead's message before you're ready to reply, without signaling it. - Sleep mode (formerly Quiet mode) pauses notifications and sends an automatic reply to anyone who DMs you. Don't leave it on during working hours. - Business tools that reply for you need a professional (creator or business) account and can only reply to people who messaged first. --- Instagram DM settings are easy to ignore, because the defaults work fine for chatting with friends. For a coach, the defaults can quietly cost you leads. A message from someone who doesn't follow you might land in a folder you never check, or never arrive at all. This guide walks through the settings worth changing, what each does, and how to check you got it right. Instagram moves its menus often, so the exact path may look slightly different on your version of the app. ## Why do Instagram DM settings matter for coaches? Instagram DM settings decide which leads can reach you and how fast you see them. Many leads don't follow you yet. They found a reel, tapped your profile and sent a message, and your settings decide whether it lands in Chats, in requests, or nowhere. For a coach, settings decide sales as much as privacy. If you never check requests, those leads wait until they give up. Instagram's Direct page says a message from anyone not connected to you "is sent as a message request and can only contain text." ## Which Instagram DM settings should you change first? Start with the settings that decide whether messages reach you, then the ones that change how fast you respond. | Setting | What it does | What a coach should do | | --- | --- | --- | | Professional account | Gives access to business tools and Meta's official messaging connection | Switch to a creator or business account | | Message controls | Decide who can message you and where requests land | Let new people reach your requests, not "don't receive" | | Hidden Words | Filters requests with flagged words into a hidden folder | Keep it on, but check the hidden folder | | Read receipts | Shows people when you've read their message | Turn off if you read messages before you can reply | | Pinned chats | Keeps up to three chats at the top | Pin your three hottest leads | | Sleep mode | Pauses notifications and auto-replies to DMs | Use it only outside working hours | | Notifications | Alerts you to new messages and requests | Keep message and request alerts on | ## How do message controls work on Instagram? Message controls let you decide who can message you directly and who can't message you at all. Meta introduced them in 2020. You can choose whether message requests go to your Chats list, your Message Requests folder, or don't arrive at all. For a coach, the right setup is simple: let people who follow you reach your Chats, and let everyone else reach your requests. Never choose "don't receive requests" for people who don't follow you, because that cuts off exactly the leads who just found you. ### What about message requests? Message requests are where most first-time leads land. Check them every day, accept the real ones, and reply from your main inbox. Our guide on [how to respond to Instagram DMs from leads](/blog/how-to-respond-to-instagram-dms-from-leads) covers what to say once you accept. ## Should you turn on Hidden Words? Yes, coaches should keep Hidden Words on, but check the hidden folder. Hidden Words moves message requests that contain offensive words, phrases or emojis into a separate hidden requests folder. The text stays covered until you tap it. Instagram says the filtering happens on your device, and you can add your own words to the list. The catch is that real leads sometimes swear. "I'm so damn stuck with my weight" is a lead, not abuse. Keep Hidden Words on to protect your inbox, and open the hidden folder a few times a week so no buyer sits there unseen. ## Should you turn off read receipts? Turn them off if you often read a lead's message before you can reply properly. Meta added the option in 2024: in Settings, open Messages and story replies, then Show read receipts. You can turn them off for all chats or for specific ones. Read receipts aren't a reason to reply late. They just give you room to read a message between sessions and answer when you can give it real attention. If you can't answer within the hour, send a short honest reply with a time. ## Pin your three hottest leads Pin the three leads closest to booking. Instagram lets you pin up to three chats to the top of your inbox, so they don't get pushed down by new messages. Press and hold the chat, then tap Pin. Swap pins as leads move. When someone books a call, unpin them and pin the next hottest conversation, so the top of your inbox becomes a short to-do list. Our guide to [booking calls from Instagram DMs](/blog/book-calls-from-instagram-dms) covers how to move a pinned lead onto your calendar. ## Should coaches use Sleep mode? Use it only when you're genuinely off, and know what it does first. Sleep mode, which Instagram launched as Quiet mode in 2023, pauses your notifications and sends an automatic reply to anyone who DMs you. It also changes your activity status so people can see you're away. That automatic reply goes to leads too. A lead who messages at 7pm on a weekday and gets "I'm in Sleep mode" may not wait for you. If your leads write in the evening, schedule Sleep mode for late night only, or have someone (or something) else answering. ## Which Instagram notification settings should you keep on? Keep notifications on for messages and message requests during your working hours. A lead who writes after a reel is often still in the app, and a notification is how you catch them while they're there. Turning notifications off and checking DMs "later" usually means checking them tomorrow. If notifications are too noisy, pause them on a schedule instead of turning them off. Sleep mode does this, but remember its automatic reply. Our guide on [DM response time and speed to lead](/blog/dm-response-time-speed-to-lead) explains why the first hour matters. ## A worked example: the cost of checking requests weekly Here's what checking requests once a week costs, using a fictional coach called Leila. About 12 of her 40 weekly DMs land in message requests, because those people don't follow her yet. If she checks requests once a week, a request waits three and a half days on average before she sees it. That's because messages arrive evenly across seven days, so the average one sits for half the week. If she checks daily, the average wait drops to about half a day. That's seven times faster for the same 12 leads, from one habit. ### What does the delay cost Leila? Suppose, as an illustrative assumption, that a third of request leads go cold once they've waited more than a day. With weekly checks, about 10 of Leila's 12 requests wait longer than a day (six days in seven). A third of 10 means she loses about 3 leads a week. With daily checks, no request waits more than a day, so she loses close to none. The settings change takes a minute; the daily check is what keeps leads from waiting. Put a daily five-minute requests check on your calendar, at the same time every day. ## Do DM settings affect business tools that reply for you? Yes, DM settings affect business tools. Any tool that replies to Instagram DMs needs a professional account and connects through Meta's official connection for business tools. That connection only lets a business reply after the person has messaged its professional account first. Most replies must go out within 24 hours of their last message. Any tool that asks for your Instagram password, or acts like a logged-in person, works outside those rules. Our guide on [how Instagram detects automation](/blog/how-instagram-detects-automation) explains why that matters. Our guides on [what Meta allows for DM automation](/blog/what-meta-allows-for-dm-automation) and [is Instagram DM automation safe](/blog/is-instagram-dm-automation-safe) cover the risks. ### How many DMs can you send? Settings don't change how many messages Instagram allows. Our guide on [how many DMs you can send on Instagram per day](/blog/how-many-dms-can-you-send-on-instagram-per-day) covers what Instagram has and hasn't published about limits. ## Why can't some people message you on Instagram? When someone can't message you on Instagram, the cause is usually their settings, not yours. Meta's default settings stop teens under 16 (under 18 in some countries) from receiving DMs from accounts they don't follow or aren't connected to. A lead might also have their own message controls set tightly, or have restricted or blocked your account. If someone says they messaged you and you can't find it, check requests, then hidden requests, then whether you restricted them by mistake. ## Where does SetLuca fit with your DM settings? SetLuca connects to your Instagram professional account through Meta's official connection and replies to people who wrote to you first, within minutes at any hour. That covers the evenings you'd otherwise cover with Sleep mode. Telegram, Instagram and Messenger are live today, and WhatsApp is coming soon. Auto-send is on by default, and you can switch any channel to review if you want to read every reply first. SetLuca pins conversations about medical issues, crisis language, harassment, payment claims or legal threats to the top of your queue. That way a person sees them first. Our [multi-channel DM playbook](/blog/multi-channel-dm-playbook) covers how Instagram fits with your other channels. ### One honest limit No setting, and no tool, checks a folder you've forgotten exists. If leads land in requests or hidden requests, someone still has to look there and accept them. Get the settings right once, then build the daily habit. ## Your 10-minute Instagram DM settings checklist This checklist covers every Instagram DM setting in this guide in the order that protects the most leads first. 1. Confirm you're on a professional account. 2. Set message controls so non-followers reach your requests. 3. Keep Hidden Words on, and note where hidden requests live. 4. Decide on read receipts. 5. Pin your three hottest leads. 6. Schedule Sleep mode for late night only, or turn it off. 7. Keep message and request notifications on during working hours. Instagram DM settings take ten minutes to fix and save leads every week. Change them once, then check your requests every day. ## FAQ ### Where are DM settings on Instagram? In the Instagram app, open Settings and look for Messages and story replies. That's where you'll find message controls, read receipts and related options. Instagram moves menus often, so the exact path may differ slightly on your version of the app. ### How do I stop missing DMs from people who don't follow me? Set your message controls so people who don't follow you can still reach your message requests, then check requests every day. Also check the hidden requests folder if Hidden Words is on, because filtered messages from real leads can land there. ### What is the hidden requests folder on Instagram? It's where Instagram puts message requests that contain words, phrases or emojis on your Hidden Words filter list. The text is covered until you tap it, and you can accept, delete or report each one. Real leads sometimes land there, so check it a few times a week. ### What does Sleep mode do to my DMs? Sleep mode, formerly called Quiet mode, pauses your notifications and sends an automatic reply to anyone who DMs you. It also changes your activity status. Because leads get that automatic reply too, schedule it for late night only, not during hours when leads usually write. ### Why can't someone message me on Instagram? It's usually their settings. Teens under 16, or under 18 in some countries, can't receive DMs from accounts they don't follow by default. The person may also have strict message controls, or you may have restricted them. Check your restricted accounts if you're unsure. ## Sources 1. [Meta, "Say Hi to Messenger: Introducing New Messaging Features for Instagram," 2020. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.fb.com/news/2020/09/new-messaging-features-for-instagram/) 2. [Instagram, "Introducing new tools to protect our community from abuse," 2021. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.instagram.com/blog/announcements/introducing-new-tools-to-protect-our-community-from-abuse) 3. [Meta, "Edit Your Messages, Pin Your Chats and More Instagram DM Updates," 2024. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.fb.com/news/2024/03/instagram-dm-updates/) 4. [Meta, "Instagram Sleep Mode (Quiet Mode): Manage Your Time & Focus," 2023, updated 2025. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.fb.com/news/2023/01/instagram-quiet-mode-manage-your-time-and-focus/) 5. [Instagram, "Instagram Direct Messenger: Video Chat & DMs." Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.instagram.com/features/direct) 6. [Meta, "Introducing Stricter Message Settings for Teens on Instagram and Facebook," 2024. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://about.fb.com/news/2024/01/introducing-stricter-message-settings-for-teens-on-instagram-and-facebook/) 7. [Meta for Developers, "Instagram API with Instagram Login: Send Messages," 2026. Retrieved 2026-10-26.](https://developers.facebook.com/documentation/instagram-platform/instagram-api-with-instagram-login/messaging-api) --- Published by SetLuca.